The Cottage: Review

I sat down the other night to watch The Cottage, and from the trailers I had seen I was expecting a witty and fun filled British flick to round out the evening.

What I actually received was pure and utter drivel, The Cottage could have been another brilliant low budget Brit comedy, but it missed the mark badly, the only saving grace in the whole film was Gollum Andy Serkis, who showed what a class act he is and that he really should be doing much better things that this rubbish, he essentially carried the film on his own shoulders, but even his acting wasn’t enough to stem the tide and I found myself bored and wanting to leave.

I must admit to feeling that lollipop dropping off the stick feeling, as the film promised so much, Andy Serkis for starters not to mention the brilliant Reece Shearsmith (Papa Lazarou and others from The League of Gentlemen) who obviously wasn’t allowed to input much of his comedy genius into the film.

Reasons To Watch:

• Andy Serkis is a class act, he almost pulled it off, but couldn’t manage alone.

• Jennifer Ellison’s body, until she opens her mouth and destroys it all.

• Jennifer Ellison getting decapitated at the end (sorry to spoil it, but if you see this rubbish you will want to kill her too)

Reasons To Miss:

• Someone thought it would be funny if every word out of Jennifer Ellison’s mouth was c#*t!, well its not! , I swear horrendously so am not a prude by any stretch of the imagination, but this is way over the top.

• The other 90 mins that didn’t involve the word c#*t.

Overall
Dont waste your time, keep your money in your pocket and see something better!!.

Rating: